Richard Ellis

A large flightless bird indigenous to the region around New Orleans, Louisiana. Some individuals may be found inland as far as Colorado. Normal height is around 6 feet, plumage varies from dull grey to beige. The Richard Ellis’ call is a complex series of noises technically known as “sound improvisation” but often referred to colloquially as an “awful racket”. Normally a docile species, the Richard Ellis will violently attack persons who pronounce “New Orleans” in a way that rhymes with “Marlins”.

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